I didn't shave. On purpose
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
