They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
