those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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