do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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