We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
