can u get pink eye on your cock?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You're like the curious george of whores
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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