just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
