No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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