dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
