dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
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