What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
