i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
