It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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