we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
