It's Friday. Sex?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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