a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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