you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
