I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
