Already got asked if we're dating
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
