I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
