also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
