and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
The adults are the big ones right?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
