He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Best friends brother. Beat that.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
