you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
