and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
