Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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