fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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