ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
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