he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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