I bet he comes in French.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
