How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
