A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize