Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
