He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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