why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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