i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Of course I have a pirate flag
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize