I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
