I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
