What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize