Me. At least after what I've been through.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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