Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
