I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
