So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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