Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize