So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
