i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Everything about him screamed your future.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize