am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
