singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
