you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
