Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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