is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
