Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
